Embracing Self Acceptance: A Journey Beyond Self Love

Love Yourself and Self Acceptance - Hello Future Self

In a world that often preaches the importance of self love, there's a subtle yet powerful shift happening—one that nudges us towards the concept of self acceptance. While the idea of loving oneself has gained immense popularity, understanding and embracing self acceptance might be the key to unlocking a deeper, more meaningful connection with ourselves.
The Berkeley Wellbeing Institute reports that those who find it hard to accept themselves can feel inadequate, feel driven to prove themselves to others, angry and sometimes shame.

​But which tools can we use to help us connect with ourselves in a meaningful way?

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Being Thankful
One powerful tool for helping us achieve this, is gratitude journaling. Taking a few moments each day to reflect on the positive aspects of our lives cultivates a mindset of appreciation. This practice shifts our focus from what we lack to what we have, fostering self acceptance by acknowledging the beauty in our own existence. The act of recognising and recording these moments of gratitude becomes a mirror reflecting the worthiness that resides within.

Meditation
Meditation, as advocated by influential figures like Jay Shetty in his Solitude podcast, can also become a sanctuary for self discovery. It's not about escaping from reality but delving into the recesses of our minds, acknowledging our thoughts without judgement. Meditation provides a space where we can embrace the entirety of who we are, fostering self-acceptance by recognising and making peace with our thoughts and emotions.
But people find this difficult to do, and some find being with their own thoughts, a scary proposition.
Psychologists at the University of Virginia and Harvard University had people sitting on their own in a featureless room for between 6 and 15 minutes
People consistently said that the short thinking period was not enjoyable and they found it difficult to concentrate.
In the most dramatic finding from the research, participants were left alone in the room with a button which administered a mild electric shock to them.
The authors note that:
“What is striking is that simply being alone with their own thoughts for 15 minutes was apparently so aversive that it drove many participants to self-administer an electric shock that they had earlier said they would pay to avoid.” (Wilson et al., 2014).

Nature
If the act of sitting quietly and meditating is a scary proposition for some, nature, with its serene landscapes and calming presence, can act as a silent mentor in the journey of self-acceptance. Spending time outdoors allows us to disconnect from the noise of the world and reconnect with our inner selves. Nature serves as a gentle reminder that, just like the natural world, we are a part of something greater, deserving of acceptance and belonging.

The path to self-acceptance involves a series of intentional choices and actions that demonstrate love in its purest form. Saying positive things to yourself, forgiving when you mess up, and being assertive all contribute to a narrative of self-acceptance. It's about setting realistic expectations, challenging oneself, and holding oneself accountable without succumbing to self-criticism.

According to psychologist Kristen Neff, self compassion is the antidote to self-criticism, anxiety, and depression, leading to greater life satisfaction. Embracing self-acceptance involves treating oneself with the same level of understanding and compassion as one would offer to a friend. This gentle yet profound shift in perspective forms the crux of a journey beyond self-love—an expedition towards a more profound and authentic connection with oneself.
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In essence, self acceptance is not about striving for an idealised version of oneself but about embracing the imperfect, beautifully flawed individual that you are. It's a journey paved with gratitude, mindful practices, and intentional choices that culminate in a harmonious relationship with the self. As you embark on this expedition, remember: it's not about loving yourself; it's about accepting and celebrating the unique person that is you.